Governor Robert Orr's "Baloney Hors D’oeuvre”
The star of this week’s recipe is baloney, or “bologna” for the more cultured among us. When I grew up, I spelled it “baloney” and I ate a LOT of baloney sandwiches. Baloney and mayonnaise, baloney and peanut butter, baloney and cheese — you name it, I devoured it as a lower-middle class 10-year old.
As the years went on, baloney and I had a falling out. Cured meats and deli meats aren’t a regular part of my lunch rotation for a few reasons: 1) I have a pescatarian wife, so it'd just be me trucking through pounds of pre-sliced ham; 2) I ran in the other direction of those foods of my childhood because they remind me of being depressed and overeating; 3) baloney is, to me now, slippery.
Will this baloney recipe win me over with its simplicity, architectural integrity and spicy top layer?
Chef Robert Orr
Republican Governor from Indiana
Favorite Food/Homespun Recipe: Recipe
Notable:
being part of the first political campaign rock music video; his killer campaign slogan “Let's Keep a Good Thing Going”
Quotable:
“My goodness, how did it leak out, I’m the oldest governor in the United States!”
As always, I followed the recipe word for word, no alterations:
INGREDIENTS
baloney
horseradish
cream cheese
INSTRUCTIONS
1) Layer thin layers of baloney alternately with cream cheese, then layer of horseradish.
That’s right, we’re on the high wire without a net — no measurements, just cream cheese and a dream. Observant readers will note in the original recipe, bologna is spelled the Midwestern way, or “child’s way” as it’s not commonly called whatsoever. What does “thin” mean? In the eye of the beholder, but as the recipe coincided with high popularity of Oscar Meyer products and they produce a “thin sliced” version, that’s where we ended up. Perhaps bologna fresh sliced would’ve been the governor’s preference, but it wasn’t noted, and for Indiana in the 1980s? I wouldn’t presume.
2) Press down firmly, clean around edges.
Give it a firm smack. Or sure, be boring and use a spatula! I did use the spatula for the sides.
3) Chill, then slice like pie in tiny pieces. Serve turned on its side.
Voila! If you want to actually watch me attempt to eat it, go to the Cookin’ with Congress Instagram or TikTok OR…YouTube! Eight layers of cream cheese, was this enough? The recipe is vague. Is this a “tiny piece?” The recipe is vague again. Am I going to enjoy this little layer cake of cream cheese, baloney and horseradish? My answer is decidedly not vague.
Verdict:
It licked back. More of a textural nightmare than anything I’ve had in 2025.