I love a mint julep — the copper cup, the fresh mint crushed against the ice, the bourbon, the folksy Southern charm of it all like Robert Duvall in Thank You for Smoking. This drink has none of that. No, this is Senator Harry Byrd Sr.’s Apple Mint Julep:

Chef Harry Byrd Sr.

Democratic Senator from Virginia

As always, I followed the recipe word for word from the maligned senator, no alterations (though I scaled down the proportions to make just one serving, since doing so with drinks is easy):

INGREDIENTS

2 cups apple juice

1 pint lime sherbert [sic]

A few drops of mint extract

Sprigs of mint

INSTRUCTIONS

1) Combine 2 cups apple juice, 1 pint, lime sherbert [sic], and a few drops mint extract.

Okay, I have to be honest here — I searched very hard but could not find a full pint of lime sherbet. Or any lime sherbet that wasn’t also mixed in with orange and strawberry. So I carved out just the lime and left the orange and strawberry for my family to ignore. One more note: mint extract that comes clear is a potential option, but I went with the deep, dark green stuff.

2) Beat until smooth, and pour into tall glasses.

3) Add a sprig of mint in each glass. 3 to 4 servings.

It did not say to serve over ice, so…no ice. I guess the ice cream chills it enough, or at least that’s the idea. One more note that has nothing to do with the recipe, but there is a Harry Byrd Sr. who served in the U.S. Senate in 1965, and then there is a Harry Byrd Jr. who served in the U.S. Senate in 1965. I thought it was a mistake but NO — the son succeeded the father. Took right over from the old Byrd.

Voila! If you want to actually watch me drink it, go to the CwC Instagram or TikTok. Bracingly green, this cocktail paints a pretty picture. Looks like it was made with Green Chartreuse or Midori or a whole clamshell of basil, but it’s just the half milliliter drops of mint extract. It is unlike any mint julep you’ve ever had because never has a mint julep also functioned as sweetened toothpaste. Refreshing! It’s also mildly thick thanks to the melted sherbet (which Harry Byrd Sr. liked to spell “sherbert” like I did when I was in elementary school).

Verdict:

Listerine. Straight up Listerine but…not even close enough to Listerine because Listerine tastes like alcohol and this JULEP does not taste like alcohol because it contains no alcohol, just extinct ice cream. Putrid drink from a putrid person.