*Beef House Special* Beef House Filled with Crab Dip
On special occasions, I diverge from the usual discovery and recreation of a recipe invented by a politician. I’ve cooked up Ketchup Cream from my friends over at 70s Dinner Party, and this week, I’ve whipped up a brand-new dish in honor of the season finale of one of my favorite family-friendly sitcoms — Beef House!
The Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim creation’s season finale, Crab Dip inspired this beautiful dish: Beef House Filled with Crab Dip.
Tim Heidecker (center) and Eric Wareheim (center) on the set of Beef House.
INGREDIENTS
2 lbs ground beef
1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
1 tbsp garlic powder
1 tsp black pepper
1/4 cup pureed prunes
1 tbsp butter
1 tbsp kosher salt, divided
16oz lump crab meat
2oz cream cheese
2oz Greek yogurt
1 tbsp scallions
2 tbsp shredded mozzarella
1/2 tsp smoked paprika
1/2 tbsp dijon mustard
1/2 tsp castoreum
INSTRUCTIONS
1) Mix beef, 3/4 tbsp salt, Worcestershire sauce, pepper, garlic powder and pureed prunes for eight minutes.
This will allow the beef to be properly broken down so it will hold its final form. You want your beef to be well-congealed and malleable.
“Sometimes we call it a beef house.”
—The Beef House boys
2) Place a layer of plastic wrap on a 15-inch shallow pan, then place beef on top.
It’s okay to use your hands when placing the beef — it’s actually very satisfying.
3) Place another layer of plastic wrap on top of the beef and use a rolling pin to flatten the beef to the edges.
4) Put your tray in the freezer for 45 minutes.
During this time, you can pre-make your crab dip (Step 7-8), if you like.
5) Remove top plastic wrap and slice beef into squares and rectangles large enough to build a house with.
6) Melt butter in a large pan and cook your burgers, two at a time, on medium heat, until well done.
You may like your beef rare or medium rare in your burgers, but we’re building houses here, not Big Macs. Cook it until the internal temperature is 145 degrees Fahrenheit or it edges toward “burnt.”
7) For the crab dip, mix all ingredients together, including 1/4 tbsp salt, and top with mozzarella cheese.
The scallions are mainly for color, and castoreum may seem like a random ingredient to include, but it’s vital to make the house taste good at the end of the recipe.
8) Place in broiler for seven minutes or until top is slightly browned.
9) Lay shredded lettuce on a plate to be the lawn of the beef house, then build your beef house and fill it with crab dip so it pours out the front door. Toothpicks may be necessary.
Wow, this dish really releases the beef! It’s swimming in dip and looks good enough to eat (which is the point, of course — this is not just decorative). It’s simple, yet gorgeous; seasoned, yet mild. The crab dip oozes out of the house, making it an easy spread for more beef. And the house itself? One door, no windows and meaty insulation, just like the sitcom version. I couldn’t have asked for a more apt representation.
I think that everyone should make their OWN Beef House and send it our way at cookinwithcongress@gmail.com. What better way to honor a new classic! Keep the beef coming! Enjoy with pills and milk at your leisure.
