My fellow Americans:

Salute these real recipes from real congresspeople, recreated with love and fear by me.

Do not try these at home.

Representative Robert Harrison's "Cinnamon Apple Salad"

Representative Robert Harrison's "Cinnamon Apple Salad"

It’s been almost two months since I’ve cooked a recipe from a non-president. Feels good to get back to the lesser-known politicians and their low-stakes dishes — no one knows Robert Harrison, so if his dish is a flop, who cares? If FDR’s dish is a flop, I might feel the heat from the FDR Library or various Roosevelt fans. This week’s recipe sounds innocuous enough, but here on Cookin’ with Congress, when it sounds innocuous, it can be dangerous.

Representative Robert Harrison

Chef Robert Harrison

Republican Representative from Nebraska

As always, I followed the recipe word for word directly from the first Nebraskan I’ve featured, no alterations:

INGREDIENTS

1 cup water

1/2 cup cinnamon red hot candies

1 pkg Jello

1 tbsp sugar

1 can (two cups) applesauce

1 pkg cream cheese

milk

INSTRUCTIONS

1) Melt cinnamon “hots” in the water over low heat.

Alright, so the recipe did not specifically call for one brand of cinnamon hot candies, so I went with Hot Tamales. I’m aware Red Hots are even spicier and might be better for this recipe, but I made my choice and can see no world in which more fireball flavor is better.

2) Add sugar, Jello and applesauce. Pour half of this mixture into a square pan. Chill.

I used an 8x8 pan and plain Jello. This is not the first time I’ve wanted to take liberties and make a recipe my own, inserting strawberry Jello instead…maybe I should do a Recipe Rescue seris?

3) Soften cheese and add a little milk. Spread over chilled Jello mixture.

I had to add a decent bit of milk — maybe 4 tbsp — to soften the cream cheese enough to be spreadable and not damaging to the bottom layer of Jello mixture.

4) Add the remaining unchilled mixture gradually. Chill. Serves 8.

Chilled overnight so I could enjoy some lovely cinnamon apple salad for breakfast, first thing.

Cinnamon apple salad

Voila! If you want to actually watch me attempt to eat it, go to the CwC Instagram or TikTok. This salad looks decidedly like sashimi. A big slab of Philadelphia roll sans rice. It smells mostly like spicy apples, and the texture is grainy on top, creamy in the middle, slushy on the bottom. The salad can’t quite bear the weight of itself, but it still looks…pretty? No. Palatable.

 

Verdict:

I’m not totally against this strange combination of fire and applesauce. I'll go on record as someone who hates Big Red gum and Fireball Whiskey, so it’s not built for me, but I’m on board…until the dairy portion of the experience. Then it just gets weird.

Robert Harrison's Cinnamon Apple Salad
Senator Larry Craig's "Super Tuber"

Senator Larry Craig's "Super Tuber"

President Millard Fillmore's "Resurrection Pie"

President Millard Fillmore's "Resurrection Pie"